


neverland

by Jydaria



Series: snapshots [1]
Category: SPY x FAMILY (Manga)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Manga Spoilers, Mentions of war/death, Up to recent-ish chapters, hurt little comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25065319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jydaria/pseuds/Jydaria
Summary: The Forgers, from the outside looking in.
Relationships: Anya Forger & Loid Forger | Twilight & Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess
Series: snapshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1827979
Comments: 16
Kudos: 86





	neverland

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in a fever dream. As in, I had many ~100-500 word fluff/family feels/wholesome Forger ideas I was throwing around in my document until my brain took an unprompted angst dive. And there’s not enough crumbs in this fandom :’)

You’re not an idiot. After all, you didn’t get to become WISE’s Handler responsible for overseeing spies and their tasks by slacking off. Twilight’s not the only genius around. And while most people in this crapsack world would wave off a snappy woman in heels ( _ let them, they have no idea what lies underneath this fragile layer of skin anyway— _ ), it only works to your benefit to lie low, stay undercover. 

You’re starting to realize that Twilight has forgotten that, too. Or rather, if he’s been traversing the spy’s life of a tightrope so long he’s forgotten which side is which. Or that he’s worn so many faces he doesn’t know his own anymore. You can’t say you envy him for being on active duty all the time, and overtime.

To him, it feels like he now lives with his job. Which isn’t wrong, per se, but it’s certainly not doing him many favors. You’re still holding tight the blackmail ( _ and memory to laugh over with a glass of wine _ ) of when he paid you an unscheduled visit to consult you about dating. Or rather, winning over his own “wife.”  _ Ha.  _ He was living the high school romancing woes ( _ the childhood _ ) he never experienced. 

This Yor Forger neé Briar was willing to marry a divorcee with a child from his “previous marriage,” and all within 48 hours at that. That’s to say nothing about her as a person, and as far as you can tell, she has a heart of gold. She gave it her all at the Eden interview, gives more than her all to raise Anya, and even played a hand in saving the summit between the East and West (albeit indirectly, because apparently she thought the terrorists were kidnapping her daughter...). She’s a damn impressive woman, and Twilight better realize it and not forget it. 

You don’t know how to tell this to him. He actually knows, somewhere in that flood of information in his head, but he won’t admit it to himself out loud. 

_ "Have you ever discovered a blown-off piece of your lover stuck to a wall?"  _

You don’t know the exact relationship between them, but you’ll be damned if there’s no  _ relationship _ period. There’s some sort of emotional investment, trust, respect, all the important things to a relationship. When Twilight admitted that Operation Strix was probably-most-definitely doomed because he ended the Eden interview by  _ breaking a table in half,  _ you knew there was something that shook him up. Besides, you’ve never been one to so easily slap a label and societal standards on relationships anyway. 

And that’s exactly why you’re slightly wary of all the ways Operation Strix could crash and burn. World peace, for one, the obvious one Twilight always keeps in the back of his mind. Their relationship, you’re afraid to tell him, is another. Twilight not coming home, and the remaining Forger family being none-the-wiser to his fate. Twilight’s occupation as a spy revealed before peace is achieved, turning carefully built relationships and trust into violent chemical reactions. 

_ "I used to have a daughter that age myself." _

He’s currently immersed in a child psychology book and looking like he went through hell and back. Twice. You’re almost afraid to ask. Almost. 

“Good afternoon, or should I say, good evening?” You quip. The joke was already old the first time around, and is now crawling. “How is she? Giving you a hard time again?” You finally get to the point. 

When he turns, you finally get a better look at his face, and. You aren’t going to inquire about his sleep schedule. You’ll settle instead for making a quip about getting rest to ensure better ( _ optimal _ ) performance—the balance between work and health.

“One of her assignments was to write a report on an occupation.” Ah yes, you remember this. Twilight was called into school because her report had included ‘punching and kicking patients.’ “When she visited my office, I had her play with the sand table while I stepped out briefly.” Twilight looks ready to sink his head into his hands—so he  _ is _ human, after all. “I  _ knew _ she’s unpredictable, despite being a child, but. That sand table, it was…” You wait patiently, and can see his face sink into all-too-human hopelessness. “ _ Utter chaos. _ I can’t believe I missed the stress she’s gone through from her point of view.”

You don’t know much about the typical analyses for a sand table, but you know more than plenty about people without such tools. “She’s gone through 4 foster homes and 2 institutions, and she’s only 6. While it definitely helps Operation Strix to teach her academics, compassion, and raise her in a stable home environment, it’s only right for her as her father. Being a spy won’t save the world overnight, you know you’re in this for the long game.” 

The look in his eyes says he doesn’t understand. Even with more sleep, he’d probably be as dense. “As soon as Operation Strix is over, there is no need for this family anymore. Of course, WISE won’t be abandoning her, I’m sure those two will be more than adequately provided for even once I’m gone.” is what he replies. A variation on the theme he says all the time. 

As if. Even if that were the case, you’d more than gladly take Anya in and shower her with whatever love remains in the shattered pieces of your heart, although you know it wouldn’t be yours that she’d want. You know from Twilight’s report of the Eden interview— _ and that god _ **_damn_ ** _ castle rental bill _ —that Anya absolutely adores him because he puts in the effort  _ for her _ first. The mission second. Relationships are a two way street. 

_ “Have you ever found the crushed bodies of your parents and siblings in a pile of rubble that used to be your home?” _

Anya deserves a family and a peaceful life. ( _ If that house were Neverland, maybe it would shelter her from the horrors of war. _ ) Reading about child psychology may help, but it won’t fix anything. Twilight’s already done most of that work, anyway, even if he doesn’t realize it. The worry is if it’s a strong foundation or if it’ll crumble. If there were a checklist or manual for every damn thing, let alone humans, life would be so much easier. There may not even be this war. 

No point in those sorts of regrets, though. Nothing else to do but move forward, and if only Twilight would realize his path ahead won’t be so lonely for a while. 

“Attachments in this line of work are only useless, a burden.” He recites, and if feelings could be turned off at will like that, well, all the more ways life could be easier. 

Loid Forger. Yor Forger. Anya Forger. You wonder if these three people will be able to hold onto each other and their fragile happiness through the tides of war. 

_ "Have you ever had friends who, haunted by shame and regret, took their own lives?"  _

You know, just like any human being on this planet, that relationships are a double edged sword. Capable of ups and down, causing happiness and pain. You can only pray for theirs.

  
And sometimes, you wonder if you’ll ever be Sylvia again. The daughter, the sister, the lover, the mother, the  _ person. _ Even if— _ when _ —the iron curtain between the East and West falls, whether you can rebuild a family ( _ fill the void _ ) from the rubble that the war left behind. 

**Author's Note:**

> “2nd person point of view being good for distancing yourself from the story” hMMMM yum angst. ALSO THE MINISTER CALLS HER SYLVIA IS THAT A FAKE NAME OR—


End file.
